For some, going to the dentist is a routine appointment. It elicits no fear, and may even be relaxing as you lay there and let someone else take care of your teeth for a minute 😉

For Robert, it’s an anxiety attack waiting to happen. The noises. The lights. The masks. The unknown. People’s hands in his mouth. Hardly anyone speaking his first language.

After a few attempts to get a check-up with our lovely local dentist, we were referred to a paediatric dentist. I had many reservations about how this could be different from other appointments.

And yet. It was. He didn’t allow for a full check up, but with some coaxing, Robert entered the exam area. Sat on a bench near the big chair. And let the dentist look in his mouth and touch his face!

The dentist claimed he was able to did more of an exam then on Robert than was expected, and looks forward to seeing Robert again soon.

This is what meeting Robert where he is looks like. No one pushed for him to sit in the big chair. When he expressed fear over the medial mask, the hygienist took off her mask. She touched his hands gently to demonstrate what she hoped to do. When he said no, she tried something else.

Did we get a cleaning? No. Was he made to feel shame for “only” letting the dentist look at his teeth? No. Instead, he was praised for being a good helper and brave. He was encouraged to come back. The dentist, in a short amount of time, tried to create a rapport with Robert.

And Robert was given space and time to be unapologetically, him.

(and yes, we did go and pick out a new hot wheel to celebrate this positive step forward)